So 2015 has ended and it has been such a mix of emotions for a year. There have been moments this year when I have been so elated I don't think I could be any happier, and then moments this year when I have felt so defeated I had no idea how things could improve.
There have been so many things this year that I have been happy for. I guess the main thing that has happened is that I made it into university. Surviving 7 years at the same secondary school some people would think of as torture, for me though, it was where I have made the most memories. I met people there that will hopefully stay in my life, and heck, hopefully people I will never have to see again! Getting past GCSE's, AS Levels, and then finally A Levels with good enough grades that I got into the university I wanted made me feel on top of the World! It gave me that bit of confidence that I can do something!
Also this year I went on my first ever girls' holiday to Ibiza, and again, this was one of the best experiences ever. As a group of friends, we know each other so well, we are able to just get along for a week, in a heatwave, by the pool, and with cocktails. Having the freedom to do what we wanted, when we wanted, was amazing. Ibiza is a beautiful island as well! It is definitely somewhere I want to return to, be that to party or sight see ;)
I guess this was also the year however my life turned upside-down. Everything was so rushed and happened all at once, our family was hit head on. As a family, we lost the most important member to us, and 4 months on, I'm still trying to pull myself together. I lost a best friend, someone who I would phone most days for a gossip and share secrets. Someone who helped raise me. I have never felt so heartbroken in all my life. But I can hear her speaking to me. It might sound crazy, but if you are as close as a family as mine is, you are definitely know how people will react and what they would say in certain situations. That's what keeps me going. Every time I find myself getting upset, I know full well she'll be saying "Come on now, no more tears. Have a drink on me and have fun. But more importantly, GET YOURSELF A BOYFRIEND!" It may sound silly, but that is what keeps me going.
I've decided though instead of the whole, 'the start of a new year is a new chapter', I don't want 2016 to be a new chapter. I want it to be a completely different book. It seems like from this point on, I want to start achieving dreams and improving as a person. I guess that's what everyone says as a New Years resolution, but it is something I need to do. These past 18 years of my life have been amazing, but they are going to be completely different from this point onwards. University means meeting new people, my family has a hole in it, and I need to embrace this.
Life is never going to be the same year to year. Some years are going to be amazing, and others awful, but these things happen. You shouldn't let life keep you down because the thing is, the number of days we have on this Earth is already determined. We never know how long we have left, a day, week, month, year, but we do know life can change in a second. You can't always be prepared for it, but I guess that makes it exciting.
So here's to a new year, and a new book!
Girl Without a Plan, Making Plans
